it doesn't make a difference if we make it or not I was just joking around with froo that someone's going to have to make me take a competency test after my dumbass-ness of the past twenty-four hours. First I locked my only car key in my car (in the minus 25 degree weather, so standing outside trying to break in with a coat hanger is painful, not to mention unsuccessful). I paid somebody to come break in properly this morning. But then this morning I park in the fire zone outside my building since I was just going in and out for a second and I've never seen anyone patrolling the parking. You guessed it, today was the day the police decide to ticket unsuspecting Alberta-plated cars. The fine is so huge (for the unemployed starving student mostly) I don't want to mention it yet. And for the grand finale of dumbass, I dropped a plant in the lobby of my apartment building, spreading potting soil and risking the life of my poor green friend. Luckily it cleaned up pretty well. But yeah, I need a chaperone to protect me from myself.  | ¶ 11:32 a.m.

  all that I need is a blunt excuse, all that I need is a ruse Maybe my opinion will change after I read more, but in reading "Renegade in Power" by Peter C. Newman about Diefenbaker, I find myself resentful of Mr. Newman's presentation of history. You know by the mere fact that the book is titled "Renegade" that Newman is not a fan of the Dief, so I find myself suspicious of his storytelling. I'm only into the first year of Dief's "reign" (1957) and Newman is talking about how Liberal leader Pearson felt it would be "irresponsible" to force an election (it was the first minority government since 1925) and was cautious about the wording of a motion he wanted to bring forward.

I wonder why he's so sympathetic of Pearson's motives and so hard on Dief. One of the quotes I've already made note of is this one: "John Diefenbaker came to the toughest job in the country without having worked for anyone but himself, without ever having hired or fired anyone, and without ever having administered anything more complicated than a walk-up law office." Okay, so maybe that's not the best experience, but who is really ready to run a country? How does one prepare for that - is there a manual? I like to believe that anyone thrust into the role of Prime Minister is winging it and figuring it out as he goes, so it annoys me when people are very critical of them, as though they had some devious master plan from the very beginning. Look at Stevie - he's doing an okay job, even though the Conservatives are not meant to run this country for long.

To contrast Mr. Newman's views, I'm reading the book "Right Honourable Men" by Michael Bliss. He is a little less harsh toward the Dief so far, but I have a lot to read yet. One interesting aspect of studying Dief is that his situation is similar to where Stevie finds himself these days. The Conservatives find themselves somehow more attractive than the Liberals after the Liberals push their luck a little too far with arrogance and their seeming sense of entitlement to govern. So the citizens elect a minority Conservative government to send a message. And if Stevie can match the Dief in his accomplishments, maybe he can sweep to a majority like Dief did in 1958. (Maybe? Not that I'm voting for it.)  | ¶ 8:53 a.m.

  I heard there was a secret chord froo got a cute new kittie cat named Shiny. If you listen close, you can hear her purring.

  | ¶ 10:23 p.m.

  we can go there, we can go anywhere Yesterday I went for a walk in the bitter cold and dazzling sun. There are train tracks behind my building and people have established somewhat illegal pathways over the tracks (holes in fences and obvious paths up and down each side of the elevated tracks). I'd noticed before that a trail seemed to continue parallel to the tracks through the thinly wooded section between the rail and neighbourhood homes, but I'd never explored. Usually I'm just cutting through on my way to the local Tim's.

At the place where I started there was a man flooding and clearing a community ice rink. I trudged on through the snow, trying to build up a little body heat on yet another minus 25-ish day (that nasty windchill). As I followed the wooded path, I saw two other backyard rinks. I walked for twenty minutes or so and just when I thought my trail would be ending and meeting up with a street, I saw another illicit pedestrian-rail crossing behind another apartment building. I hopped the tracks, found the street and walked speedily home. It was shady on the street and by this time I was good and chilled. Ah, winter in Canada.  | ¶ 9:00 p.m.

  keep me sailing this ocean with you Since the agency I met with this week does a lot of the temporary placements for the federal government, they're getting me to fill out a security clearance form. The frustrating part is that they want all of your addresses for the past five years (or ten if you're trying to get "secret" clearance). You gotta know for a drifter like me that this is not a simple request. I'm getting to that point where I don't remember all my addresses, and certainly not my postal codes. So today I decided I'd just create a Word document with all the addresses I can remember and the dates I lived there. In the past five years I've had eight addresses. And going back ten years I'm up to fifteen addresses so far - still working on that. Jeebus.  | ¶ 2:12 p.m.

  and another one's gone, and another one's gone We're having some reverse global warming here in the East. Painfully cold. I won't complain too much, though, because I know the West has had their share, and I'm not really forced to spend much time outside these days, so it doesn't affect me much. The good news for Ottawa is that the Rideau Canal will probably freeze on time for the festivities of Winterlude, which obviously include skating. I'm going to try and rent some skates and get out there at least once - should be fun if we can get out of this deep-freeze a bit.

froo sent me this fun little quiz earlier. Try it!  | ¶ 11:14 p.m.

  you are my sweetest downfall, I loved you first Happy Hershey Day!

This morning I had a meeting with another employment agency and was on my way to Bank Street in downtown Ottawa in the frigid cold when Devin and I came upon a person distributing O Henry bars. We each took one and wondered what was up with the candy distribution. Further down the street we encountered another gentleman who was happily passing out Reese peanut butter cups and also exclaiming, "Happy Hershey Day!"

Who knew.

In other news, the agency had a funny keyboard with a sticky spacebar, so my typing speed was recorded at a reduced rate of 59 words per minute.  | ¶ 8:18 p.m.

  park that car, drop that phone, sleep on the floor, dream about me When I was home for Christmas I made helped Gina create a flickr account so they could share pictures with family. Alas, they aren't terribly motivated to help loved ones feel connected (!) so there were no new photos uploaded this past month. I was delighted to see a a few new ones last night, however, even though I found out it was froo who put them there when she was babysitting for the evening. This is my mom and Kyle and Ella.

I've been a bit of a jogging machine this month. Remember how I said I didn't want to stay "fat"? Okay, so I've never been terribly overweight, but my fleshy bits bother me quite a bit, and I have found in the past few years that it takes more work to get back to where I'm supposed to be (=I'm getting old). So I've jogged at least three times every week this month. It was really hard for a while - I sometimes get exertion headaches, and my pace was pretty slow. But after accumulating 35-ish kilometres in distance covered, I think I've finally made it to the next level. I jogged last night before bed and managed to up my distance to 3.7 km without too much pain (!). Having the 3-week deadline for a bikini-worthy body will help me stay motivated.

[/jogging report]  | ¶ 11:32 a.m.

  I will wait to find if this will last forever It's funny to see that the post just before this one is the one where I'm the nay-sayer of Mexico, and now I'm announcing that I'm going there next month. Yep, froo and I will be taking a trip to the lovely storm-beaten Cancun. The reviews for our hotel indicate that the beach in front might be mostly destroyed, but I figure we go in with low expectations and it will be fine. Plus, I always get tired of the beach after the first day anyway. So long as there are pools available we'll be set.

So I've gotta buckle down and get my school work organized to make sure I'm not scrambling next month when I travel not only to Mexico but to Calgary for Superbowl weekend. I couldn't possibly celebrate that glorious weekend of baseball anywhere but in Calgary. Okay, okay, that's not why I'm going...

I'm taking three classes only this semester. One is the continuation of my "Canadian Political History" course. I'm also taking the "Politics of European Integration", and "Canadian Public Policy". So naturally that means three major projects. I'm going to be writing my term paper on John Diefenbaker for history, doing some policy analysis on Stevie's Accountability Act (in addition to another major policy project, still undefined), and I will be doing a major paper (worth 50% - youch!) covering an aspect of European integration. So the plan is to get stuff done early. I'm diving into my Deef research pretty quick, since I have a ton of books on him already. Apparently he was a shitty prime minister - who knew? Part of the assignment is to examine whether that reputation is truly deserved, of course, so I'll let you know what I come up with. I did already read that JFK did not like him - I'm sure that's an important opinion to consider.  | ¶ 2:42 p.m.

  I followed the voice you gave to me

"I hate being a Canadian because I haven't seen nobody, nobody from the government doing anything at all," she told reporters on Sunday. "They don't care."

I don't blame that family for being incensed. For all their talk about improving Canada's image and authority on the world stage, our "new" Conservative government has not done much to stand up for Canadians. Enough with this bullshit happening in Mexico - first that murdered couple, and now this, and all we get are these sketchy details from Mexican police about what happened. And where are our politicians?

I feel pretty nervous about Mexico after reading some of the facts and letters on the CTV website. For example, Since 1994, 28 Canadians have been killed in Mexico. About half those deaths have occurred in the past five years. And this excerpt from a letter:

I have lived in Mexico for extended periods and you should be aware of two things before you come here. ONE: Stay out of nightclubs and TWO: NEVER have any contact with Policia, if possible.

Please use some common sense, and don't stay out until all hours, and for God's sake do not even look at Mexican women, if you are a single man. Machismo is alive and well here, and life is cheap.

Don't bring your iPod or fancy camera onto the street -- leave the gold and watches behind in Canada. Stay sober, stay away from nightclubs. And you will notice that Mexicans avoid drinking Tequila -- you should too....we call it GAZ here. Gasoline.

Spooky.  | ¶ 11:39 p.m.

  with a broken wing she carries her dreams Well, I can see why Leonardo DiCaprio is nominated for a Golden Globe for his performance in "Blood Diamond". We went to see the movie last night and I was suitably impressed while at the same time horrified and sickened by the story. I haven't really been a huge fan of Leo, and even the clips in the preview for this film didn't impress me, but wow, does he do a good job. On the other hand, wow, what a brutally sad portrayal of a horrific time in Sierra Leone. If it's not the violence occurring as rebel and government forces battle it out with rockets and machine guns, it's the twisted images of turning young boys into killers that made it hard to watch so many scenes. Despite that, it's a great movie that really makes you think.

Because some of the scenes of refugee camps were incredibly depressing and had me thinking, "how is it even possible that people live like that?!", this line from the movie stuck with me "Sometimes I wonder," the smuggler says, "will God ever forgive us the things we've done to each other? Then I look around and realize, God left this place a long time ago." Seriously. I wonder if we're ever going to stop fighting and get on with fixing things.  | ¶ 9:34 p.m.

  well I fought with a stranger and I met myself
Yesterday I had a meeting / interview at a legal placement agency about getting me out working. It was both encouraging and discouraging, because I got the reinforcement of being told that I have great "skills", but then the depressing realization that those skills consist of the ability to type over eighty words a minute (I tested at 87 WPM yesterday) and scoring "excellent" on the test for Microsoft Word. Woo hoo, I can edit documents REALLY FAST. Of course I fall back on legal admin work 'cause that's what I know and that's what I'm good at, but surely goodness I have more to offer this world than my wicked-fast typing. I just never seem to know quite how to get off this track. I have some applications in with the government, but sadly our federal government seems to have a snail's pace hiring process, and I think I can maybe hope to get hired in about six months or something. Can somebody please hire me as a proofreader / editor / writer / researcher? That's what I want to do at this point. Not cater to the whim of a lawyer who's too useless to type his own emails. GRR.

After the meeting I hopped in a cab and made the short trip across the bridge to Hull to meet Devin for lunch. It's nice to visit Quebec 'cause although the city of Gatineau isn't terribly impressive (as compared to, say, Montreal or Quebec), you do get that feeling of "different-ness" about the culture. The cute restaurants and cafés are not what you're accustomed to in English Canada. After lunch we went for coffee and the place even served it European-style in these little cups you see in this photo. After my trip to Prague and Amsterdam in 2005, I acquired a taste for drinking my coffee this way (that's why I like the Americanos from Starbucks and Second Cup now), so it was fun to have it that way again. We felt so fancy.  | ¶ 4:47 p.m.

  just another soldier on the road to nowhere This is a clip from Rick Mercer's show this week. It's funny but SO wrong.

  | ¶ 7:43 a.m.

  I hope you'll have more than you'll ever need Can somebody tell me the difference between this campaign and this campaign?

At poker the other night, the too-serious-guy sitting next to me was wearing the white band, so I showed him mine. Only I bought mine a couple years ago now and it says "ONE" and has the website "www.one.org" shown. His says "makepovertyhistory.ca". And I said, "yeah, same thing", but he looks at me like, "how can it be the same thing?". And now I'm confused because there are two separate websites, except ONE is "the campaign to make poverty history", so how can these be two separate missions?  | ¶ 2:38 p.m.

  we do what we need to be free, and it leans on me like a rootless tree I've been doing a bit of file management on my computer since with the installation of a new motherboard I also got a new version of Windows, and files must be moved and organized. Blah blah tech talk...

Anyway.

I was sorting through old pictures and videos and came upon something that looked mighty familiar to me. You see, this year at our Boxing Day turkey dinner, my brother Jamie was getting a little carried away with the whip cream. Little dots of the stuff were getting dispensed in random spots around the dinner table and empty tin tart dishes would get a generous pile. In this picture he had just given Gina a shot of the stuff on her hands, which were innocently minding their own business beside me.

So it amused me to see a similar scenario from my 2005 collection, only this time, it was Keri with the whip cream can. In this clip you can see the gigantic pile of whip cream he had just piled on froo's piece of pie. I think he was even tempted to give my camera a shot! (This video was taken before I exchanged the camera for one that recorded audio, so this is a silent movie.)

  | ¶ 10:15 a.m.

  all I needed was the love you gave I enjoyed the movie Garden State, and I loved the soundtrack that Zach Braff put together for it, so when his new movie came out recently, I decided to check out the soundtrack (haven't seen the movie yet). He includes a song by Joshua Radin that I liked, so I followed up by downloading his entire album. And on that album he does a cover of a song called "Only You" that was very familiar to me but I couldn't quite place. With the fancy technology of the interweb, though, I managed to figure out the origin of the song. It was one of those a capella tunes released in the 80s by a group called the Flying Pickets. And what do you know, somebody has even put the video on YouTube. Here it is for your amusement.

  | ¶ 6:21 p.m.

  you hadn’t lost the one thing you kept in a safe place It's been another whirlwind weekend in my world. A trip to North Hatley to dust off our poker skills at Scott's meant lots of driving, and this time Devin and I decided that since we go through Montreal for that journey, why not break up the trip with some stops. So we had an enjoyable lunch with a friend downtown that was made slightly frustrating only by the hordes of Montrealers converging in the vicinity for a hockey game. Montreal is really a unique city to visit.

Since we're experiencing an off-season spring climate, the roads and weather were pleasant, other than some gusty wind. This photo was taken near the lake in downtown NH and there were crazy waves happening around us. That made it very surprising indeed to see a tiny motorboat out there in the midst of the watery upheaval, but it looked like it made it to the dock safely.

With the great popularity of Devin's Cosmopolitans at our New Year's bash, he was persuaded to whip up another batch for poker (whip up = shaken as "needed"). I think several people successfully over-indulged and have maybe had their fill of the stuff for a while.

I did decent at poker. We played three games with a solid line-up of respectable poker players (I was the only female), and I managed to finish in the top three in the first two games. That was good, but for the last game we upped the buy-in and therefore had a bigger pot for the winner, so it would have been nice to get that one. Next time..!

This morning began with a much-needed greasy breakfast of bacon and French toast, and then the riders of Red hit the road through the sunny hills of the Eastern Townships and set a course for Cowansville, where Devin's father lives. After a nice visit and dinner, it was back on the road to Ottawa for us. Two weary travellers are a little bleary-eyed tonight still feeling the effects of a last-minute coffee stop in Montreal yet desperately needing rest. I put a few more photos on my flickr page if you want to look.  | ¶ 11:58 p.m.

  you're the only light I ever saw
A point-form update, because I'm lazy:

For Christmas, since I asked froo to get me "gold", she decided to wrap everybody's presents in gold wrapping paper. A fun theme.

Scott took more pictures than me at our New Year's party. They're here. The shirt I'm wearing was a gift from Persuade, who specifically said she was thinking it would be good for a New Year's party.

I'm officially fat after lots of Christmas eating and drinking. Don't worry, this won't last long.

Happy anniversary to Mom & Dalt, who celebrated 13 years of marriage over the holidays.

I played scrabble twice over the break. It's been years since I did this.

I played poker several times over the break. I'm planning to get back into some online play over at pokerroom now that I can rely on my computer not to crash.

My nieces and nephew are as cute as ever (as you've seen on my many videos). I think it's hardest being far away from children because they grow up so quickly you feel like you're missing so much.

I bought myself an Air Canada flight pass yesterday. I figure I need to tend to soothing my soul with more trips to visit family and friends while I continue to settle into Ottawa.

I'm taking a lighter course load this term. I plan to get some temp work. Hell, with the way Carleton schedules classes, I could practically work fulltime. We'll see how that pans out.

It's true! Jamie's eggnog is very, very good. It also contributes to fattening of people!

I got a B+ in my Public Affairs Analysis class. I'm not sure why we're starting another semester without getting the remaining marks.

My mom tried making this new stuffing with the turkey dinner this year that had cranberries in it. It was super-fantastic and yummy.

The global warming going on these days means that it feels very much like spring already in Ottawa. Also, I'm happy to report that we're getting more sun lately. After a very gloomy fall of too many grey days, this is a welcome development.  | ¶ 6:03 p.m.

  feel what you feel, as long as it's real Sorry, people, I'm here, I'm alright, just getting organized and having some computer repairs done. My "new" computer finally seems new - i.e. it doesn't crash when I try to use MSN Messenger or Google Maps (and numerous other things). Oh, and I got a new webcam for Christmas and that works too. I've got stories coming, but for now here's another video of a scene from our family Christmas. This was taken just before we ate our scrumptious turkey dinner on Boxing Day.
  | ¶ 2:41 p.m.