I walked into a honkey tonkey just the other day My friend Zouz recently moved in with a new roommate, who I'll call Robin. Now when Zouz and I first met Robin, we were pretty impressed with her ambition and focus. She is in her early 20s and works for one of the big oil companies in town. She makes kickass money and negotiated with her company for all sorts of perks, for instance flying the company "jet" to her adopted hometown (another oil town in Alberta) every two weeks. And such.

Robin is actually an East Coast girl like me. She's got the accent and she's very enthusiastic and chatty. And when I met her I assumed she was a little pudgy, but it turns out that she has treated herself to massive breast implants and these actually give the false image that she carries some extra weight. To each their own, eh.

As time has gone on Zouz has gotten to know Robin on a level that she finds rather trying. Robin used to have a fiance and seemed a bit settled. Well, now they've broken up and she's become quite the, umm, social butterfly, shall we say. She basically spends all her free time on dating sites advertising her double Gs to the menfolk out there. Zouz has a unique way of conveying the situation:

Zouz:
So, in her continuing quest to be thin, Robin succeeded in spending 350 in groceries so that she can start the Body for Life program. This, in addition to the diet pills and the fat eliminating injections. This is so that she can be thin for Stampede so that she can wear as little as humanly possible... and do I have to tell you how disappointed she is that she will be unable to flash her chest balloons for the general populus on the Red Mile?
Chief:
That girl is a piece of work, man.
Zouz:
UNREAL

  | ¶ 1:19 p.m.

  poverty stole your golden shoes but it didn't steal your laughter On Wednesday night, I attended a football seminar with froo and one of our co-workers (Candice) put on by the Calgary Stampeders. It was a nifty event for the schmooze factor, but since they sold it as a "ladies only football seminar", I think we expected it to be a little more instructive than it was. If you really want to teach football at a beginner level, perhaps having these components taught by professional-level coaches and players isn't the best approach, unless these particular individuals have demonstrated a true teaching ability.

We were addressed by Coach Tom Higgins, quarterback Henry Burris, linebacker Scott Coe, and finally by one of the referees, a guy named Jim. The last two did a really great job, but the coach and quarterback were less impressive. With Henry, I felt like I was missing the joke a lot of the time. It seemed like a lot of his comments were directed at and appreciated by a bunch of people at the back of the room (Stampeders staff and volunteers?). And maybe a lot of the women in attendance signed up more to be around the players than to learn about football, so it was a bit of a fanfest, with people cheering with recognition of the names he threw out. I knew nothing about the Stampeders' roster, so it was all Greek to me.

They used a lot of video clips to demonstrate their lessons, but again, it was like they didn't get that they needed to explain precisely what we were looking at. In pretty much every clip, I didn't even know which team I was supposed to be watching, so I pretty much missed the lesson by the time I figured it out!

The good parts of the evening were the refreshments provided, including lots of appetizers upon arriving and later dessert, and also a free bar service. Also, the evening ended with a locker room tour - that was interesting. They asked for a volunteer and proceeded to dress her up in all the equipment a player wears (including jockstrap!). You can see the photos here.  | ¶ 4:58 p.m.

  I put your picture away My new addiction:


So far I'm sticking with the "Easy" level - personal best of 6:08. I'm going to get good and practised up before I make the jump to Medium.  | ¶ 1:39 p.m.

  we could close our eyes it's still there It's playoff season! Yesterday I watched three hockey games. Am I hockey fan or what... On Friday we had a gathering at the compound to watch the Flames game on the big screen. Persuade and Devin came over to watch Dalt's sixty-inch television with me, Dalt and Jame. It was good times. Go Flames!

On Thursday I woke up with (what I thought was) a stiff neck. You know those days, when for no apparent reason you just can't turn your head a certain way without excruciating pain...? It happens to me now and then. And I thought it took a day or two to go away. So I pushed through, ignoring the discomfort and even going for a jog after work. It wasn't that bad...

But it hasn't gone away. And I basically spent my weekend suffering because the worst pain is during the night when you need to use those neck muscles to lift your head when you shift positions or get up. I was awake numerous times every night, and up early in the morning because it just gets too frustrating lying there in pain. I've tried Tiger Balm. I've tried the magic beanbag-thing that you microwave and wrap around your neck. I've tried hot showers and hot baths. I've tried massive amounts of drugs. I've tried massages (by Devin). And it all only gives temporary relief. Tonight I'm going to pay for a professional massage therapist to do some work on me (and I'll miss the Montreal game).

In other news, Saturday Devin and I went to see Thank You for Smoking. It was quite amusing - lots of good actors in that one. Even though Aaron Eckhart plays a smoking lobbyist and they have numerous scenes where smoking would have seemed natural, I noticed that they don't actually show any of the characters smoking. They show a couple clips of old movies where the stars would sometimes smoke, but nothing present-day. Interesting.  | ¶ 5:34 p.m.

  what I just paid for dinner would be a down-payment on a house I am reading the May issue of Vanity Fair magazine - their first "Green Issue" - and just read something I find very interesting.

If capitalism were a church, Yvon Chouinard, 67, would have been excommunicated as a heretic long ago. Not that it would have bothered the pioneering rugged-wear-maker, who has always been more comfortable on the rock faces of El Capitan than in the boardroom. Nicknamed "the Tiny Terror" by his friend Tom Brokaw, Chouinard approaches his business like a revolutionary, donating 30 percent of his annual salary to activist environmental groups and radicalizing Patagonia's corporate code with a promise to post bail for employees arrested for nonviolent civil disobedience (after receiving protest training) in support of environmental causes. And yet, by keeping up the quality of its products, Patagonia has stayed plenty profitable without losing its soul. It was the first U.S. company to print its catalogue on recycled paper, in 1984, and the first to make fleece jackets using recycled plastic bottles, in 1993.

Cool.  | ¶ 5:39 p.m.

  so sublime when the stars are aligned
You may have noticed that I added a flickr banner over on the right. I recently upgraded to a pro account, so I'm taking advantage by uploading some older stuff and re-creating sets that I was forced to delete (you only get three with the free service). One of my projects recently was scanning in a bunch of my pictures from when Pam and I went to Prague last March. I got those all done and uploaded and I created this set over on flickr. Hey, better late than never, eh?

It's actually kinda cool to re-live the experience through the photos. Last year when I got back to school I was going through so much stress (remember March madness?) that I didn't have a chance to absorb the full impact of the trip. I joked at the time that I'd been spoiled by going to Prague for my first trip to Europe, since it was such a fabulous city to visit. As time passes, the more I suspect that I'm right about that. God only knows when I'll get the opportunity to even leave the country now...! Anyway, check out the pics (mostly taken by Pam, actually) if you like. And seriously, if you ever have the chance to go to Prague, DO.  | ¶ 12:58 a.m.

  you're just going through the motions and you're not being fair I downloaded an old favourite song of mine today - Superwoman by Karyn White. Devin just referred to it as "90s cheese", so if you don't know it and don't appreciate 90s music, it's probably not for you. But I love it.

I'm not your superwoman
I'm not the kind of girl that you can let down
And think that everything's okay
Boy, I am only human
This girl needs more than occasional hugs
as a token of love from you to me, ooh, baby  | ¶ 2:17 p.m.

  and it's me who is my enemy This made me laugh (with commentary from the Superficial):

In the shocker of all shockers, Tom Cruise isn't the linguistic expert he claims to be. Despite telling everybody Suri means "princess" in Hebrew, Hebrew linguists have confirmed that it doesn't.

Suri has only two meanings - one is a person from Syria and the other "go away" when addressed to a female. Hebrew expert Jonathan Went says, "I think it's fair to say they have made a mistake here. There are variations of the way the Hebrew name for princess is spelt but I have never seen it this way." Suri can also be translated into a Hindi boy's name, and it also means "pointy nose" in some Indian dialects and "pickpocket" in Japanese.

The crazy bastard named his daughter "pointy nosed pickpocket." I take back whatever I said about Tom Cruise, because only a genius of maniacal proportions could come up with that. I just wonder how he's gonna top it. He's gonna have to name his next kid "degenerate puppy killer" or something.

Hilarious.  | ¶ 5:33 p.m.

  he's waiting for the day when he gets me BRR. I remember this:

It's been 17 years since [Allan] Legere, an escaped convict, went on a killing spree in the Miramichi area.

During a seven-month period in 1989, Legere escaped from prison and four people were murdered. RCMP led the biggest manhunt in the province's history and New Brunswickers were scared. Many were sleeping with loaded rifles and putting floodlights in their yards.

I think he was in Moncton the day he escaped. He had come to Moncton for medical treatment and escaped from the hospital. I remember that froo had walked home from school through a park that they ended up searching.

My dad grew up in the Miramichi and went to school with the guy's sister. The priest at the church we went to when we visited my grandmother was killed during this escape. The dude was bad news.  | ¶ 3:18 p.m.

  am I a part of the cure, or am I part of the disease froo's rockin' performance on this video has been very popular over at Google Video, so I thought I'd share with you all if you hadn't seen it yet. It's Coldplay, in case you can't figure that out.

  | ¶ 1:37 p.m.

  ...happy birthday, dear Dalton... Update! Join in the singing...



We gathered at the compound tonight for - what else - a barbecue to celebrate Dalt's birthday. As you can see, Ella enjoyed the cake.

Pics are here.  | ¶ 12:17 a.m.

  then you rise and shine forever
I took a bunch of pics on Thursday after work. If you want, you can see them here.  | ¶ 1:56 p.m.

  I got a rainbow round my shoulder On Sunday, after being all inspired by the half-marathoners, I decided it would be a good time to get out and try some more jogging. I dragged Devin with me, with strict orders not to show off (running is a lot easier for him given his considerable youth...:P). We did a 3.4 km loop at a nice gentle pace and neither one of us keeled over. But only one of us has sore quads now. That would be me.

Speaking of workouts, Fred was put to the test last night. We met Jame, Keri and Matt at the Kensington Pub for a beer before taking in Taj Mahal at the Jack Singer Concert Hall. And then all five of us piled into my little Festiva for the ride across town. To compound the situation, after the show froo also joined us, so Fred was chauffering SIX of us. Poor little Fred Festiva. He's a champ.  | ¶ 1:58 p.m.

  we got heaps and heaps of what we sow

Yay, Keri!

My brother ran in the Chinook half-marathon this morning and did awesome! He didn't stick around for the official standings but figured he'd come in about 7th overall (about 1:28 running time), from a starting pool of several hundred people. Not bad for an old dude! (Okay, he's only 34.)  | ¶ 3:59 p.m.

  take me by the hand, take me somewhere new
They're trying something new in Calgary. Since we all had too much fun in 2004 during the Flames playoff run, well, apparently we gotta crack down and make sure the party doesn't get any better. The police have announced these crazy traffic control measures to try and discourage anyone from heading down the "Red Mile" from the Saddledome (you can only drive one direction on 17th Avenue during these periods). These are in effect during ALL remaining home and away games, in addition to any playoff games. Eep.

So the other night after joining froo and some co-workers at the Rose & Crown, Devin and I took a stroll down 17th, right through the heart of the so-called Red Mile (a WAY over-used term in this town, as far as I'm concerned). The number of policemen is kinda ludicrous at this point. As we passed policeman after policeman (on bikes, on foot, leaning against their patrol cars), I kept saying, "I almost think this makes it worse somehow". The plan is to crack down on all sorts of minor infractions - public drunkenness, public nudity, littering, jaywalking, etc. But it seems to add an element of tension that almost antagonizes rather than contain. I dunno, man.

Of course, I don't mean to say that the cops are all assholes or something. I remember having a conversation with one policeman during the 2004 craziness who told me that he hated drunk people and hated crowds. By contrast, the other night I stopped to ask one guy in front of Melrose whether we'd won the game (everybody seemed pretty jovial, but it was the start of a long weekend and a beautiful spring evening, so you never know). He was a friendly policeman who seemed pleased to share the information with me. Yay, we secured our playoff spot. Good times.  | ¶ 4:32 p.m.

  conversation with a three year-old... she: can I have your money?

froo: what money?

she: the quarters that were on your dresser.

froo: they were on my dresser, where are they now?

she: I put them in my boots for safe keeping.

froo: ah...  | ¶ 3:28 p.m.

  show me what it's like to be the last one standing This video always makes Devin and I laugh our butts off. We're such dorks.
  | ¶ 1:11 p.m.

  I'd dress them wicked, I'd give them names Have you seen the fish face people?  | ¶ 2:57 p.m.

  you gotta wake up slow After what has seemed like a long dark winter (more of a darkness of the mind), I have been making a real effort to change my mindset and change my surroundings. I have a lot of purging to do if I am to leave town in the fall for Carleton. I have a lot of general working out to do to get my body (and by association, my mind) to where they need to be. Oddly enough, work has actually been busy this month because of the company's financing and board meeting schedule, so at least I'm not dying of boredom during the day lately.

So far, some of the spring cleaning projects I've tackled or completed include donating a large bag of clothing to charity, emptying out and dismantling my falling-apart IKEA dresser (Devin did the dismantling part), going through financial paperwork and organizing it in a new pretty pink folder thing (having a pretty organizer helps!), committing to an exercise routine and healthier eating, and assessing my financial goals and making a plan for the summer months (in order to make significant progress on my credit card debt I can basically do nothing this summer... eep).

It's pretty satifying to address these things. I don't like to own a lot of stuff at this point in my life, so getting rid of paper, books, clothes and furniture is a welcome unburdening. I don't like feeling fat and out-of-shape, so diving back into a weight routine, some cardio and yoga makes my body feel better. Having a financial plan helps me not to blow my money bit by bit on daily expenditures. I won't know for a few months how much money the student loan people will give me (the new application forms don't come out 'til late May...?), so I'm in limbo as far as concrete moving-to-Ottawa plans go.

The weather is getting nicer and the days are getting longer. It's beginning to look a lot like...

Summer in Calgary.  | ¶ 1:02 a.m.

  though you only stayed a moment, we all know that you're the one Sit back, relax, and let the water cool your feet.

froo filmed this in Mexico last year. Nice, eh?  | ¶ 9:58 a.m.

  it's over, it's over, it's over my head On Friday night I went to see a live music performance by a great Canadian band. I'd never heard of them before, but Keri had heard them on CBC radio that morning and wanted to take in "Cuff the Duke" that night at the SAIT student pub, the "Gate". Jamie was in, Devin was in, and so was I.

It took a few false starts for the show to get rolling. Jamie almost got turned away at the door for not having ID (this looking-younger-than-your-age thing is a broad Ryan theme: he's turning thirty this year...), then a fire alarm / lights up / evacuation of the bar just as the main act was getting started. The lead singer had just retrieved a guitar and was about to do an outdoor acoustic performance on the steps of the building when we were told we were clear to go back in. Kinda too bad in a way that it was so quick - that would've been cool.

Anyway, check out their website and listen to the songs they've got available if you like - these guys put on a great show. I have couple video (actually more audio) clips that I'll post later. Also see my fun group pics here.  | ¶ 11:03 a.m.

  beauty's only all I want to see I'm wearing new shoes today. They're from Payless. Sometimes you gotta wade through some crap when you're there, but they have some fun stuff for nice cheap prices. Good website, too, I've discovered.

When Devin and I were looking at these shoes, I described them as "so wrong that they're almost right". Cause, you know, they're brown and pink. But they work, somehow. I got that line from America's Next Top Model - one of the judges described one of the contestants that way.

My new shoes were made by Champion, in case you were wondering. They're comfy.  | ¶ 5:33 p.m.

  the little things we hide Interesting.

Theory X assumes that the average person:

• Dislikes work and attempts to avoid it.
• Has no ambition, wants no responsibility, and would rather follow than lead.
• Is self-centered and therefore does not care about organizational goals.
• Resists change.
• Is gullible and not particularly intelligent.

Essentially, Theory X assumes that people work only for money and security.

Theory Y makes the following general assumptions:

• Work can be as natural as play and rest.
• People will be self-directed to meet their work objectives if they are committed to them.
• People will be committed to their objectives if rewards are in place that address higher needs such as self-fulfillment.
• Under these conditions, people will seek responsibility.
• Most people can handle responsibility because creativity and ingenuity are common in the population.

Under these assumptions, there is an opportunity to align personal goals with organizational goals by using the employee's own quest for fulfillment as the motivator. McGregor stressed that Theory Y management does not imply a soft approach.

This is cool to read about, and I would agree somewhat. Mostly the "...employee's own quest for fulfillment" part. But I struggle in my current place of employment. We joke about the complete lack of management and direction ("we" being some of the people I've met through froo). Having no sense of purpose or expectation, I don't quite feel "committed" to work objectives most of the time. That's because I don't know what the objectives for my position are...! I'm good at board meetings, I'll say that. But that has a lot to do with the fact that I've done them in a previous job. All that bowing to demands, catering to whims, organizing logistics is familiar to me. Other than that, I don't have a clue. I hate to admit it sometimes, but I've come to discover that I need to be managed, at least a little bit.

Hello? Manager...?

  | ¶ 11:42 p.m.

  they must mean business For you geek types:

Web 2.0 or Star Wars Character?  | ¶ 11:23 p.m.

  sometimes it's hard to believe you remember me I am desperate to feel useful again. Work has been a little bit hectic this week because Bob is out of town (on business), and we finalized a financing deal (with prospectus!) and had a board meeting concurrently. I had to organize everything on the Calgary end, including revising and distributing board materials right up to the last minute. I was at the Westin Hotel dropping off a binder for one dude after work yesterday. This morning I had to be in before 7 AM (!) to make sure everything was ready and the food was set up - even brewed two pots of coffee for the people... We had people calling in to the conference call from five different time zones. I collected signatures from directors and executive, forwarded them to external counsel.

And you know, I MISS it, this busy-ness and touch of stress. The prolonged boredom has taken a serious toll on my level of initiative and even my confidence. When you sit most days doing f*ck-all, it's hard to feel good about your day or yourself. At the Westin yesterday it was total chaos - I had to find parking, deal with the valet, and there were hordes of people milling about waiting for the visiting hockey team (I think). It was awesome to be surrounded by that energy, though. I MISS the hustle and bustle of downtown, and even just getting to SEE people. Day after day after day, I'm stuck in a corner cube all by my lonesome to wile away the hours, desperately counting down the days.

The other day I seriously thought that if I could find a short-term gig at a new place, I'd happily make that move. With the Carleton-plan hovering in the wings, though, I'm not actively looking for change at this point. Argh. God help my sanity. Just. Five. More. Months.

[/whine]  | ¶ 11:10 a.m.

  it's like I just stepped outside when everything was going right Welcome to my cat-blog, starring Salsa. I'm trying to keep up with the demand for more cat content...(!)
  | ¶ 5:43 p.m.

  recurring dreams of minor chords The other night at the Bonanza froo and I sat down at her shiny digital piano and played some tunes. We have a duet that we've been playing together since we were in junior high school called the Merry Boys Polka. It's a fun, catchy little song, which, due to the thousands of times we've played it, we can practically play with our eyes closed, and at a crazy fast pace. We'll start out slowly and gradually speed up more and more until it's just silly. That's the advantage of the psychic twin phenomenon - we have great synchronicity in our duet-playing. No, we're not really psychic.

When we started playing the other night GM and Dan-the-man started giggling like fools. I guess there's something amusing about twins dressed identically sitting side by side on a piano bench playing a fun little ditty. Who knew.

See the Bonanza slideshow here.  | ¶ 7:33 p.m.

  in the future where will I be? Birthday report:

Today is my birthday, but the celebrations actually taking place today consist of turning off my phone and vegging out with Devin. I've been out a little too much these past few days, and now we've lost an hour in the spring-forward for spring business. This means I'm tired, tired, tired, and not looking foward to work tomorrow. Here's the recap.

Wednesday evening at Ceili's with Stacey and Sabina went a little later than planned. So Thursday was already a bit of a long day to get through. Thank goodness I'd booked Friday off a long time ago, so I got in some extra sleep time. Friday afternoon I stopped by the compound and helped organize an impromptu barbecue. Since Jame was unable to make it to the party last night, he suggested the "pre-bonanza bonanza" and we all headed down to Reggie's for some after-dinner drinks. By the time Saturday rolled around, truth be told, I didn't have a ton of energy left for partying. But we had a fun night at froo's place, enjoying lovely pomegranate martinis and lots of chips and dip.




Anyway, this is what 32 looks like. Or, thirty-for-the-third-time.  | ¶ 9:54 p.m.

  HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHIEF !   | ¶ 8:39 p.m.

  H A P P Y    B I R T H D A Y    F R O O !  | ¶ 3:06 p.m.

  I've seen enough I'm not giving up
Last night we had a bit of a "pre-bonanza bonanza" - that's what Jamie kept calling it, anyway. Devin and I met up with Jamie and his buddy at Reggie's (also known as Sam's Pub) and froo joined us a bit later. We had some beers and banana-jagermeister shooters and played pool. That's froo, Jame and me in that pic. I'll post more later.

And tonight is another party. Man, this turning-thirty-for-the-third-time is hard work!  | ¶ 6:47 p.m.